Imagination

Yeah, just took a lil distraction from my brother, and a few texts from a friend, and im a bit better now :]
Thanks you two xD

Prom and the sniffles

I had this little, what could you call it, fantasy? Dream? Pick a word, im not so sure..
A fantasy of my senior year, back in my late freshman year. Dreams of how wonderful and amazing prom would be and the person i was to take. This lasted till my mid-late sophmore years, when i felt that dream really flourished, when i was soo sure on how that day was supposed to happen.
And in my junior years, ohh, the fascination, my heart was soo set..
Till it was crushed around early senior year, around November, from there, i wasnt soo sure on anything after that..

I felt like, all time i spent thinking about my futures, for the past few years, was.. in reality.. a waste of time...

All my mixed and bottled emotions, they stay with me, and will continue with me
Its shit i cannot let go...

So i sit today, alone at my table for lunch
Eating plain rice..

And im thinking, all those hours and years, thinking about special things i could do in the future, and im just sitting here, alone...
There is noone to blame for ANY of this, but myself, my lack of taking extreme risks and expressing my feelings...

I sit there alone, and im thinking about the rest of my class, 2008.
So many of them, this is the most exciting part of there lives to date, they are ready to enjoy there night and events to follow.

And im sitting here, alone, eating rice..

I was going to go to Music @ the pointe, but when i think about it, and someone else brought this up to me... If i do go, im gonna be alone there.
There isnt really ANY reason to go, if im just alone..

If i do go, get around to talking to people, im sure they will ask how others are doing, and what im i to say?
Oh they are getting ready for prom, and im just a loner whos gonna hang around little kids for no apparent reason whatsoever..
That, and anything i do today, remindes me of stuff i stated earlier, and that just continues to bring me down...


Not long, this chapter of my life will close, forever finishing the book of my life..
And from the finished book, perhaps i will find a place ethereal to.....

Also, i got the sniffles, it sucks...

Secret Confessions

I still dont feel like your helping me, although it does have a number of replies, i still dont feel justice from it..

I guess its really not confessing...

Getting closer

School year is coming closer and closer to ending, was talking to some juniors in 5th, and they are already doing registration for next year.
And then i sat there, sheesh, i only got a month left of school..
Then thats it..

It keeps crossing my mind more and more often, what im gonna do after highschool, i keep replaying actions in my mind, over and over.
I dunno...
Its odd thinking about it..
Just soo many thought flow through my head, so many people. I wonder if im still gonna be able to make time to hang around all those i still love and trust, trying my best to keep in contact while everyone proceeds with there life..

Anyways, im gonna work with my brother this weekend to gut out my garage, after that, we are gonna plan on buying a weight set so we can work out.
But the garage needs to be redone, theres no room at the moment -_-

Eh, in do time.



Unrelated note:
Ice climbers are cute :]

My Sunday

Started off something like this...



But ended up being like this..


At least my backyard is starting to look nice now xD
mySQL can wait, my nephew/niece wanted to play



Ah, another night, and ill get the scripts working...
Also, my sister-in-law is expected to give birth soon.

Mischievous

-_-: if you cared THAT much about me
-_-: you would tell them
-_-: you can't go
-_-: cause youre too busy talking to me

Eh, i gotta admit, tonight was fun. Chilling at matts, Watching the new harold and kumar movie, Shopping carts and krispy kreme doughnuts (they are fucking awsome)


Also yesterday, rocking out was fun too, till the cops came xD